GOOD NEWS!

Your application has been accepted to CLOWN
UNIVERSITY.

I am Professor HAPPY THE CLOWN.  It's time for your
first CLOWN CLASS.  Let's make sure your properly
dressed for the occasion.   I have a PARTY HAT that will
just complete your special look.   As a PROFESSIONAL
CLOWN your going to be making some big bucks so I
have a couple of big pockets for you.  Yes, it's a couple of
balloons to hang around your neck.  What is a CLOWN
without a red nose?  NOTHING, so I have a little make up
lesson for you too!

Now it's time for a lesson in BALLOON ANIMAL
SCULPTING.  Yes I know you have never done this before
and your going to look quite silly in front of all your
friends but just think of the photos/video they are getting.   
The loss of your dignity is being preserved for all time!

Shall we take a moment and look over your application to
CLOWN UNIVERSITY.  You know the one where you told
us all about your personality quirks, bad habits,
embarassing stories, nicknames, etc.  How wonderful of
you to share.

This should all take about 15 minutes and then you can
enjoy the graduation ceremony!

Sincerely,

Professor Happy the Clown  PHD   (professional happy
dimwit)
PROFESSOR HAPPY THE CLOWN
SINGING TELEGRAM DESCRIPTION
LET HAPPY TELL YOU ABOUT HIMSELF
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